My name is Kellen and this is my story:
I grew up in an ok home. My family was far from wealthy, but then there were many people a lot worse off than we were. I had the arguments with my parents from time to time but overall I was a good kid: no trouble in school, above average grades, not a single detention ever… I was everything I thought I was supposed to be.
High school began. Teenage years, depression, low self-esteem. I had very few friends, and I never seemed to fit into any of the “cliques” that seem to naturally form in the social order of high schools. Though I had a few people I’d hang out with, I had no real friends that I could talk to about stuff. I realized that I couldn’t always get perfect grades or be better than everyone else. I realized I was limited. Naturally, I got depressed. I had no reason to live, and a few times I thought about giving up… but I was scared … I knew that if I were to die I’d be judged, and I knew I had messed up from time to time. I knew I wouldn’t deserve to go to “heaven” if there was such a thing. So there I was, unhappy. I finished high school and decided I’d go to college… with a college degree I could get a good job, make plenty of money, and then I’d buy myself some happiness. So what if it was expensive, I planned to be rich. It wasn’t until I began college that I learned of something I could never afford to buy. And someone had already paid the price for me, in full.
I’d heard this all my life. Jesus Christ died upon the cross so that my sins would be forgiven. This was why I could get into heaven. I’d heard it. I said I believed it , at least on Sundays. But the significance had never sunken in . I thought that as long as I was a “good” person by following “the rules,” then I would be ok… but I soon found out that there was more to it than that.
What I came to realize was so simple, yet it had such a big impact on me. God loves me. Me as an individual. He wants more than to see me “follow the rules.” He wants to see me grow as a person, and grow closer to Him. He wants me to confide in Him, ask Him for advice and even for help. He is my Father and He wants what is best for His son.
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